Want to know who’s the rich boy in EA High? Just follow the girls

A departing German ambassador in Dar es Salaam a few years back amazed his audience at a farewell party by saying that, after three years in the country, he still had no clue about what makes Tanzania tick. An awesome confession from a diplomat, considering that in reality, diplomacy is legalised espionage.

A diplomat is an authorised spy who enters a country, presents his credentials to the head of state, then goes on a shopping spree for information from civil servants, security officers, politicians and if his host is developed, from scientists as well. It seems the German was so tight-fisted his shopping basked remained empty.

But even without shopping for information, understanding Tanzania is not difficult. The East African leaders — except Burundi — have understood Tanzania quite well, which is why they are alternately cajoling and bullying the biggest East African Community partner into action.

Tanzania is big, rich and in no hurry to jump onto the dance floor like its hungry neighbours. If you remember those high school dances, the ordinary boys would “spot” the girl they wanted to dance with and dart across the floor to their target to ask for the honour even before the record started playing.

Sometimes two or three boys would charge at the same girl. But the confident boys — star sportsmen or those from fabulously rich families — did not have to scramble. They would sit back and wait for the girls to ask them for a dance.

Tanzania is the rich boy of the East African High School, as it were. Its territory is larger than all the other four partners put together, leaving enough room to fit in another Rwanda and Burundi.

It shares a border with each of the other four members, plus four more other countries — Malawi, Zambia, Mozambique and DR Congo. The country has a long coastline and with Zanzibar as part of it, its territorial waters are too vast to fathom. Bluntly put, Tanzania does not need its neighbours all that badly and is suspicious of our motives.

Tanzania’s stupendous natural resources are being coveted by the United States, China, South Africa and Europe as well as its poor EAC neighbours. The rich boy can sit back and wait for the girls to ask him for a dance.

The natural gas deposits being developed in the south of the country are more than enough to supply all Tanzania’s energy needs for the foreseeable future. Its gold, tanzanite, diamonds, name it, can make any trade partner it accepts rich.

The Serengeti’s tourism potential has everybody with money ogling, from oil sheiks to American millionaires. The endless agricultural land, with many rivers and underground water just a couple of metres below the surface, has India, China and Turkey salivating.

Not many countries in the world boast of bordering eight neighbours plus a 1,500-kilometre coastline. If you don’t come to the dance floor, we shall dance alone, the poor neighbours are saying. But the rich boy can hardly hear them, with the richer women from across the seas shouting in his ears inviting him to dance with them.

He gives a tolerant smile to the poor neighbours, but is in no hurry to fall into the arms of the rich women from overseas either. He continues weighing his options…

Joachim Buwembo is a Knight International fellow for development journalism. E-mail: [email protected]